The Reason To Live And Let The Reason Be _________

When I wrote this Heading many of people suggested me with deleting the void after “Be” and fill it with “Love” I said it’s up to the reader to put in their view. By saying this I would like to say this story is nothing but some experiences that I experienced personally and through others experience and derived my filling up the blank which I completely different from others view which is “Happiness”. So by saying this lets start with the story.

 “Hey why you are doing this? What will you get by doing this?” Were the first of the question the boy has ever heard in his life. He didn’t know the answer but he was happy doing the thing. The boy was innocent and was always bullied. But he was in the mindset of doing things his way. People used to say he is crack or sometimes even Mentally Retarded person but he was happy doing what he wanted and that was the only thing he wanted to do. He was always asked what will you become after you grow up and he learned to say one thing that was “I don’t know” and listening to that people used to laugh out loud. The best thing was he used to laugh with the people around him. That just used to make them laugh more and after some point of time really annoyed after which he usually was abused and cursed. This made the boy really depressed and left with no option but to cry in a corner alone. No one did understand till now why said “I don’t know” and then laughed with them. It was just his pureness in his hear that made him do this. He used to get happy whenever he saw others happy because of his action even at the cost of himself. That’s how he defined “Happiness”. Still if he is asked about the future he either says the same thing being an office going professional or he says I m planning on it. He as a little boy always suffered for others greed and he just used to oblige to see them happy. Rather say this boy always lived for others killing his own needs. Let it be his own family he never asked for anything rather whatever he used to get in school like chocolates he never used to eat it but take it home and give it to his elder brother saying lie that he had got 2 and 1 of it was brought for him. He never let the family member about this thing ever in his life till now in his life. He always respected and loved his elder brother but where these brotherly fights do not happen in this world. This family was no different for it. But the parents were proud to have 2 of the gem that’s what they termed because they never used to fight when they were outside house. This guy grew up like all others did and a phase came where he liked to dominate over others. He never forgot that phase. He used to get happy by dominating over others. He liked to boss over others even best of his friends. He thought enough was enough and if being a boss is the way to find respect he will follow the way. He felt really happy doing so because a guy who was hardly noticed in the class was made the monitor of the class and was known by everyone now in the class. He felt happy till he got into fight with his best friend and was sorely hurt to the core but couldn’t say sorry because he was the boss and the bosses don’t say sorry. But the hurt thought him one thing. That being a boss can earn respect but not happiness that he wanted to find. He was big enough to think now and he thought what he has earned in this period was all full of artificialness as when the time came all stepped back but the friend with whom he had fought was with him. He thought for many hours what he earned and what he lost. And he found he had lost all the happy moments he was alone with everyone around. That was the day when he got the taste of reality and turned into what he was (most neglected and most unknown person). But the things had changed in these years and he found it difficult to do so. But eventually in a weeks time he made up for the period he was happy being bossy. He went and asked for sorry from his best pal which he is till date and he did forgive him without any regrets. He went into shell and no one did recognize him after a month’s time and everyone started treating him the same way but he felt happy again.

The Second phase was when he started going to Classes in 10^th Grade. This boy had a huge crush on this girl in his Classes that he was all deaf and dumb when she used to appear in his vision range. This was the phase between he got in fight with his friend and his leaving Bossyness. This was the precise period the girl too responded properly to this boy. He was so attracted that he even joined some extra classes for math that was next to unnecessary. He used to act all cool and stuff that’s in short ignoring his close friends and joining some other friend group but he did that just because he was happy doing it. The first time conversed with the girl was just the word “yes” because after that he was almost not able to breathe as he was not able believe he was conversing with this girl. Well cutting the story short he got well acquainted with this girl and almost always everyday used to talk with her in this extra class of his. She treated him as a friend who used to do help her with things that others were not able to. Once the boy helped the girl by giving her the Label Collection of cartoons which made her really happy and in turn made his day. This was observed by his friend and said her to pay the boy the money he had spent in buying it. He said no need to do that and the scene eventually turned into their verbal battle ground which eventually turned into physical the next day in the school. So that’s how the boy had a fight with his beat pal. Soon he was entering a phase where he wanted his best pal to be with him but he was never seen but because his ego didn’t allow he never went to him and said sorry. The days went by but the company of the girl didn’t suffice to his happiness but he felt empty. He searched for the reason for this emptiness ignoring the fact and deploying mind elsewhere. But he soon recognized the reason and started to see backwards and he could see everything happening in front of him. He could not digest the fact only for the reason that he had done this all. As he realized the fact it was time to do the confession and go into shell and be the same old person that he was. As he started turning into same old person the girl started to distance herself from this boy.

This precisely coincides with third phase of this boy’s life. This was when he came to know what was politics and in hard way. He never told anyone about his feeling to the girl but to this guy who spread it to everyone in his friend group. Well as all school guys have their own group that boy too had a group in his school which comprised of 7 people. This guy wanted to enter into the group as the girl he was behind was in our group. The boy tried his level best to induct him into the group but as fate had something else in its mind it never turned out to be a positive response from the group member. But the boy still tried his level best to do so. After sometime the boy also lost his hopes in getting him in but he did not want to see his so called friend unhappy so he used to say he was trying his level best but the group members were not ready to let him in. But the so called friend felt the boy was playing politics. He felt the boy was saying something to him and doing something else in the group or he was informed so by someone bugged by daily asking about him getting into the group. This was the time when the boy was returning to his old life style leaving all flashy things behind. He said sorry to his best pal with whom he had a fight. He forgave him but he said please don’t try to get this so called friend of his into this group. He told me twice but I still tried. At this time the boy started to get the feeling of the girl trying to distance herself from him. The boy was having no clue what was going on so that he was getting ignored. He scraped through his 10^th exams. The results showed his inefficiency in studies but that was not the true picture. It was a picture that was carved out of the situation but he was in no position to explain that to anyone. He fought every inch against everyone to get into his field of interest for 11^th and 12^th that was Science. But he was opposed at every step just because of his grades in 10^th. He sweared to himself that he would score more marks in 12^th than what he had in 10^th as the society saw the usual tendency of students scoring less grades than in 10^th. In this period he missed the talking with the girl and he was drifted in the same sea again. Because of his so called friend he was boycotted by his group but this boy stayed with this so called friend of his and never left for only the due concern that he would be alone and he would be sad. He thought the boy took his side because he was the one who was trying to create a relationship between the boy and the girl. So the girl started to ignore more and more. One day he met with a strange incident with the girl he was falling for. It was one of the boy’s school mates birthday which was her friend too. The girl as usual asked everyone about what to gift the boy and then she looked enthusiastically at the boy took his name the boy’s heart beat started running faster than a Super Fast train and then she dint ask anything instead removed the eye contact that was established and started talking to her friends about the gift. The girl felt as if taking the boy’s name was a great mistake and she was trying to correct her mistake by not talking to him. This made boy feel what mistake he did and wanted to run away and go back home. But he stayed there only for the sake to give his school mate the gift. He was merely a spectator after that incident. He was neither consulted nor asked nor talked with. He was just like a new person in a group of old friends. He felt the urge to ask the girl what mistake did he do and why was she treating him like that but he couldn’t collect any courage to do so. The next few months he was alone as the so called friend found his new friend circle and almost forgot about the boy. One day the so called friend called the boy for going for a round that was almost a routine few months ago. The boy went with him feeling happy that the so called friend didn’t forget about him. That day the reality came out what the so called friend did to the boy. The so called friend and his new friends were teasing each other at that time one of his friend who knew me too had shaven off his mustache and the so called friend said in the native language “Wow what a pair only for the sake of the girl who cut her hair u have taken off your mustache…” at that time it struck to the boy what was going on. The so called friend had just called the boy a couple of days back saying the girl had cut hair due t some allergic problem. His friend saw towards me and said don’t say in front of him he will understand and that made things that were blur more obvious and the boy came to know the reasons for the girl to distance herself with him and those weird reactions. He came to know what he was doing all these time with him. The so called friend in this time added more salt by saying he will not understand and these conversation was going on in native language. Then the so called friend turned towards the boy and asked did you understand anything the boy said no and smiled and at this the so called friend and his friends laughed in front of the boy the only reason he thought was his happiness in others happiness. This was the incidence that changed his life course. He made this rage inside him as the power to show the world that what he can do no one else can do that was to hike his percentage in 12^th by considerable amount. He was in 11^th during this incidence. He failed twice in exams got even zero in one of the subjects. But he never gave up. He was by then steel resolved to do what he had taken in hand. He never used to go out of home as his friends had boycotted him and his so called friend had backstabbed him. He was alone and he learnt a lot in this period. Even though he got his friends back in the beginning of 12^th grade but till then he was a person of steel.

As he sweared he did pass out 12^th grade with 13% hike in percentage.